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June 17, 2013 – 9:00 am |

This collection of short jokes has been made with the desire to make you laugh. Some of them won’t and for that I apologise, well I’m English, so I apologise at the drop of a …

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Home » Classic Comedy

Short Jokes Mother’s Day

Submitted by on March 3, 2013 – 3:46 pm

Mother's Day Jokes

Mother’s Day Jokes

I’ve been found on Mother’s Day morning with a pair of scissors and an idea that I can find a bouquet of daffodils from the neighbour’s front garden.

Short Jokes Mother’s Day,  by mothers and jokes about mothers

Mother’s Day Jokes Top 11

 By Mothers 

“If it’s five o’clock and the children are still alive, I’ve done my job.”



“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I’m gonna move in with them.”

Phyllis Diller


“I’m a mother with two small children, so I don’t take as much crap as I used to.”

Pamela Anderson


“My mother used to say that there are no strangers, only friends you haven’t met yet. She’s now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia.”

Dame Edna Everage


“I know how to do anything, I’m a mom.”

 Roseanne Barr


Concerning Mothers

“My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn’t have sex quite so often.”

Emo Philips


“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?”

Milton Berle


“When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead.”

Jeff Shaw


“Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”

Ambrose Bierce


“My mother loved children, she would have given anything if I had been one.”

Groucho Marx


“My mum’s so pessimistic, that if there was an Olympics for pessimism … she wouldn’t fancy her chances.”

Nish Kumar




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