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June 17, 2013 – 9:00 am |

This collection of short jokes has been made with the desire to make you laugh. Some of them won’t and for that I apologise, well I’m English, so I apologise at the drop of a …

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Home » Classic Comedy

Spike Milligan Jokes

Submitted by on February 13, 2013 – 9:30 am

Spike Milligan

Spike Milligan Jokes in 4 words

The Granddaddy of Mirth

Spike Milligan is a genius, a poet, a writer and performer.

Spike Milligan

What madness is this? It’s Spike Milligan you fool! He had all the gifts for comedy and a vast reservoir of words. He suffered badly from depression and mania. Today they’d most likely lock him up. Isn’t ‘today’ stupid?

Spike Milligan Jokes Top 10

1. “My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.”

2. “Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?.”

3. “We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!”

4. “A signature always reveals a man’s character – and sometimes even his name.”

5. “All men are cremated equal.”

6. “I don’t mind dying.  I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” 

7. “His vibrato sounded like he was driving a tractor over a ploughed field with weights tied to his scrotum.”

8. “Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. “

9. “A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.”

10. “I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.” 

Bless you Spike,

25 Classic short jokes and one-liners to waste a bit of time on.

TooT! 

Jim

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