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Pyrates (Pirates)

Pyrates or Pirates

The Pyrates

There was a great STORM! Three Seventeenth Pirates (Pyrates) were shipwrecked on the coast of present day England [Best not ask too many questions about that]. Led by the great pirate ‘Captain Nice,’ a man of action and many poses; his crew have many adventures in present day England.


Captain Nice: Our hero

Granite: Large, Angry & hairy

Woody: A poet, partly made of wood.


Best Reading Experience

For the full ‘Pirate Experience’ best to read this out loud in your best PIRATE voice, “BELIKE!”



‘Wake of The Leveson Inquiry’



Granite The PirateGRANITE:

What’s a Leveson?




WOODY: Woody The Pirate

Tis’ a poet like a Yeats!



Captain Nice The PiratesCAPTAIN NICE:

I think you’ll find he’s a Grand Inquisitor rooting out the evil Murdoch Empire.




GRANITE:Granite The Pirate

Like them Spanish Dog Conquistadors robbing us of the New World? BELIKE!



Captain Nice The PiratesCAPTAIN NICE:

Well. You might be right Granite. And it’s ‘…those Spanish dogs,’ not “them…”

End of Excerpt



Read Pirate Episodes Here


Pirates: ‘Boris Johnson’s Island’

Pirates: ‘Wake of the Leveson Inquiry’

Pirates: ‘Antique Roadshow’